My Life

What is this whole gender thing?

So there’s a lot of controversies right now around being transgender and other genders. A lot of people are wondering, “Since when is there more than 2 genders?” Well let me tell you. I know for a fact that there were transgender men and women all the way back to the 70’s. It just wasn’t accepted then. It was a thing of the future and ignorant people didn’t understand it so they were afraid of it.

If you know me well, you know I myself identify as genderqueer. I’ve been this way for a long time, I just recently found a term that I identify with. What is genderqueer? It’s different things for different people. For me, it means I do not identify as male or female. For some people it means they identify as both. So then comes the question, “well what about pronouns?” Since I don’t publicly tell everyone I’m genderqueer, I really don’t care if I get called “She”. The pronoun thing has never mattered to me. If that’s the gender a person sees me as then that’s their opinion and they are entitled to it. That’s just the way I am. This is more of an issue for transgender people. Pronouns are typically a big thing with them because they want to validate who they really are. I’ve just accepted the fact that most of my family and friends would be uncomfortable calling me “they” or “them”, so I let them use “she”/”her” since I was born female.

“How do you dress?” How ever I want to. Maybe I’ll wear a dress and leggings. Maybe I’ll wear guys jeans with a t-shirt and a breast binder. Most days, I wear a bra, t-shirt and girls jeans. Does that make me any less genderqueer? No. I am who I am and that’s all there is to it. How do I do my hair? Well, for the last almost 2 years it has been a type of pixie. I started growing it out earlier this year and it’s almost to my shoulders. Recently I’ve decided to get it cut short again because I’m tired of dealing with it. It’s easier to manage short and I think I look better with short hair.

So let’s talk gender. Here’s from wikipedia: Genderqueer (GQ), also termed non-binary (NB), is a catch-all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine‍—‌identities which are thus outside of the gender binary and cisnormativity.[1] Genderqueer people may express a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither, in their gender expression. Genderqueer can also be called “Gender Fluid” or “Agender”.

In case you don’t understand the term “transgender” by now, this is from the gender.wikia page: Transgender or Transexuality is an umbrella term for anyone whose internal experience of gender does not match the gender they were assigned at birth (normally based on genitalia). Transgender people often experience discomfort or distress due to their gender not being recognized by others, and therefore wish to transition to being viewed as their true gender identity.

So I’m a big LGBTQ+ supporter. I have been since I was a child. I grew up around gay men and lesbian women because my mom had multiple friends that were. I watch the show “I am Jazz” and I’ve watched Caitlyn Jenner’s show “I am Cait”. I’ve also watched the ABC Family series “Becoming Us” a year or so when it was on. I’ve done my research. I’ve found that today’s millennial generation is more accepting of gender identity than the older generations. Again, people don’t like what they don’t understand. So we need to educate them. Not everyone has a supportive family when it comes to their being transgender or nonbinary.

Do your research. Read up about it. When you meet someone that is transgender or genderqueer, ask them what pronouns they prefer. Stop being stuck in the old ways just because you don’t think it’s natural. Times have changed and they are only going to change more as time goes on so you must learn to adapt.

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